Ordinary or extraordinary? 20 or 30 years from now, which of these words will describe how you lived your life. Did you make your life's choices because they were easy, normal, or what everyone else did? Or did you challenge the norm? Did you conform, or did you strive for something better? Did you do what everyone else was doing because it was easy, or did you step out and do what you really wanted to do even though it was more difficult?
When people ask you, "what do you do?", do you answer with your profession? Or do you have something greater about your life than where you spend 40 hours a week that defines who you are?
Peer pressure doesn't end when we graduate high school, or even college. It is present our entire lives. If your neighbors, co-workers, friends, and family happen to be the most excellent spouses, parents, and employees, if they are healthy, happy, and financially secure, then you will be surrounded by positive peer pressure. But if your peers don't meet all these standards, it's probably safe to say that you have plenty of neutral or negative peer pressure in your life.
More than likely peer pressure is influencing how much and what you watch on tv and what you let your kids watch. It may affect where you go on vacations, what you eat, what type of car you drive, where you live, how you decorate your house, what you wear, what music you listen to. Just about all decisions we make can be affected by peer pressure, either for good, for bad, or indifferent.
Is there an area of your life you would like to achieve excellence in? It could be health, friendship, family roles, a sport, or career. If you are wanting to focus on excellence in your life, you need to realize that excellence is difficult. People who seek excellence are often ridiculed for being different by their peers.
For example, if you choose to parent with a more "traditional" approach and follow more strict guideline as to what you allow your children to watch on tv or at the movies, you are sure to hear from some other parents about being "over protective."
Humans are social animals. We don't like being outcasts. It's far easier to go along with the crowd than to stand out. I think that anyone who seeks excellence should go out of their way to be laid back. Practice humility. Certainly don't act as if you are better than others. Appear ordinary in every way you can. I believe by doing this that you can avoid turning other people off and maybe be motivation to a few others to pursue excellence themselves. Wanting to help others better themselves is another way we can reach excellence.
5 qualities will lead you to excellence.
1. High Motivation. This goes beyond giving lip service to goals. A truly motivated person is on a mission. They have a hard time keeping themselves in check. They spend time writing and evaluating their goals. They study by reading books, watching videos, and attending clinics and seminars. They get up early and stay up late. They welcome company in their journey, but will go it alone if they need to.
2. Discipline. The disciplined person will make daily sacrifices and make do with hardships in order to excel. If they are trying to achieve a healthy weight, they can go to a birthday party and say no to cake and ice cream. If they are aiming to be fit, they don't miss workouts. If they are striving for a promotion, they go in to work early and stay at work late. They don't get sloppy with anything that has to do with their goals. Most people don't have discipline like this, so you may find yourself making light of your own discipline to be accepted by your peers.
3. Confidence. Some people seem to live with an unwavering belief in themselves. I'm not one of those people. How many of us, when we got married or became parents, didn't wonder if we had what it took to be a good spouse or a good parent. Heck, I remember hoping that I had enough sense just to keep a baby alive, let alone to be a good parent. To have more confidence, all it takes is some success. Success breeds confidence. After that 1st kids made it to 3 years old and I hadn't let it die yet, I was much more confident bringing the 2nd one home. Never dwell on failures. Seek out and relive your successes.
4. Focus. Another way to think about this is to call it "purpose". Know where you want to go in life. Don't expect to drift along, going wherever the winds of life blow you, and one day end up achieving your goals. Each effort you make towards your goals leads towards excellence. But you have to take it one step at a time. Which leads us to...
5. Patience. Martial artists practice katas or forms. These are martial arts moves done in sequence like gymnastics floor exercises. They are simulations of martial arts moves in an imaginary fight with imaginary opponents. A Korean proverb says that once a student practices the kata 100 times, he knows the moves to the kata. Once he practices it 1000 times, he should be able to visualize the opponents lying around him on the floor who he has killed. Once he has practiced the kata 10,000 times, the moves of the kata will be so real and life-like that the audience watching him perform will be able to visualize the fight and the opponents being slain. Excellence takes time to achieve, and anyone wanting success will have to have patience and not give up early.
Excellence requires mental and emotional power. We all have the capacity to develop these mental abilities.
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
Reach your biggest goals
Just getting back from a successful pool workout and thinking about setting goals that look like mountains when we set them. 4 months ago I set a goal to complete a 70.3 Ironman event for my 40th birthday. A half Ironman includes a 1.2 mile swim as the first event. When I set the goal, I could just barely swim two laps in a pool for a total of 50 yards. That is just 2% of the swim distance I would need to be able to do. Since then I've taken swim lessons, been to triathlon swim clinics, started open water swimming, bought some Speedos(at least I look like I know what I'm doing), learned about googles, pull buoys, kick boards, swim technique drills, bought a wet suit, and I've been swimming 3-4 days a week.
And today I just swam 48 laps non-stop, or about .68 miles. It was slow and my technique may not have been Michael Phelps-esque at the end(or at the beginning for that matter) but non the less, I can now say I can swim over 1/2 mile.
Less than two weeks away from my first sprint triathlon that starts with a 400 meter swim, and I'm finally feeling like I just might not need to be pulled in by a kayak and have my stomach pumped.
I share this with the hope of being an encouragement to you in reaching your goals. Hopefully, you have some mountainous goals of your own. Need to lose 100 pounds? Want to get off the couch and run a 5K, 10K, or maybe even a marathon? Want to go back to school and finish your college degree, or maybe you dropped out of high school and want to get a GED?
Get started. It doesn't matter how fast you move towards your goal at the start, its important to just get moving. I like the marathon t-shirts that say, "The miracle is not that I finished, but that I had the courage to start." Get a book, subscribe to a magazine, join a club, research on the internet, whatever you need to do to start learning about what you want to accomplish. Get away from the people who have given up on their goals, and get around the people who have attained what you want.
And please don't use the excuse that you don't have time. I'm sure there are a few of you more busy than I am, but only a few. It's not uncommon for me to work 28 days out of a 30 day month, and most of those 12 hour shifts. I teach two karate classes a week if I'm not working. I swim, bike, or run 7 hours a week. I cut my own grass, tend to a vegetable garden, do the banking, help cook meals, help with dishes, sometimes laundry, and house chores. I'm still and involved dad and husband. I'm not a superman, I'm just like you. But I make time for what is important to me. Want to accomplish big things? The number one thing you can do is turn off the tv. It's amazing how many books you can read, how much time you can spend jumping on a trampoline with your kids, and how many miles you can run if you will just eliminate that one thing from your life. I've decided that the tv just doesn't add any value to my life and decided to give it up. If I could just do the same thing with Jelly Bellys….
Let me leave you now with this. I hope it inspires you like it does me. Turn up the sound and watch it in full screen.
And today I just swam 48 laps non-stop, or about .68 miles. It was slow and my technique may not have been Michael Phelps-esque at the end(or at the beginning for that matter) but non the less, I can now say I can swim over 1/2 mile.
Less than two weeks away from my first sprint triathlon that starts with a 400 meter swim, and I'm finally feeling like I just might not need to be pulled in by a kayak and have my stomach pumped.
I share this with the hope of being an encouragement to you in reaching your goals. Hopefully, you have some mountainous goals of your own. Need to lose 100 pounds? Want to get off the couch and run a 5K, 10K, or maybe even a marathon? Want to go back to school and finish your college degree, or maybe you dropped out of high school and want to get a GED?
Get started. It doesn't matter how fast you move towards your goal at the start, its important to just get moving. I like the marathon t-shirts that say, "The miracle is not that I finished, but that I had the courage to start." Get a book, subscribe to a magazine, join a club, research on the internet, whatever you need to do to start learning about what you want to accomplish. Get away from the people who have given up on their goals, and get around the people who have attained what you want.
And please don't use the excuse that you don't have time. I'm sure there are a few of you more busy than I am, but only a few. It's not uncommon for me to work 28 days out of a 30 day month, and most of those 12 hour shifts. I teach two karate classes a week if I'm not working. I swim, bike, or run 7 hours a week. I cut my own grass, tend to a vegetable garden, do the banking, help cook meals, help with dishes, sometimes laundry, and house chores. I'm still and involved dad and husband. I'm not a superman, I'm just like you. But I make time for what is important to me. Want to accomplish big things? The number one thing you can do is turn off the tv. It's amazing how many books you can read, how much time you can spend jumping on a trampoline with your kids, and how many miles you can run if you will just eliminate that one thing from your life. I've decided that the tv just doesn't add any value to my life and decided to give it up. If I could just do the same thing with Jelly Bellys….
Let me leave you now with this. I hope it inspires you like it does me. Turn up the sound and watch it in full screen.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Setting and achieving goals
It's now the middle of March. How many of your "New Year's Resolutions" have you given up on already? The whole New Year's resolution thing seems to be such a negative experience that I'm surprised that so many people keep saying each January that this is the year they are going to lose weight, going to eat healthier, going to exercise, etc, etc, etc. I doubt that they fail because of a lack of desire, but because of a lack of knowledge of how to set and achieve goals.
Goal setting is so easy that even a 7 year old can learn it. As I said in an earlier post, on New Year's Eve I sat with my wife and daughters and we each set our goals for the year. After the girls returned to school, my first grader's teacher talked to her class about resolutions, and shared as an example that hers was to lose weight. Her teacher later shared with me that my daughter was quick to correct her and tell her that her goal was not specific enough. My daughter let her teacher know that goals have to be specific, so she shouldn't just say she wants to lose wieght, but also how much. Just like dear old dad taught her!
So that leads me to point 1: Be specific, and be as specific as you can. Think of a target you might shoot at. It is in the shape of a circle with rings painted on it, each smaller as you get to the center, ending in the middle with a bullseye. Setting a general goal is better than no goal at all, but what will help you be more successful is setting a goal with a bullseye. A goal to eat more fruit is a broad and blurry target. A goal to eat 2 pieces of fruit a day is a bullseye. A specific goal will be much easier to track. You will know daily weather you are achieving your goal, and if not, you will know exactly what you need to do to improve.
Point 2: Write your goals down. It may seem a given, but you should have a written list of your goals. This list will not be etched in stone. I hope that after several months, it will have coffee stains on it because you look over it at breakfast, it will have check marks by goals you have accomplished, it will have new goals written on it, and it will have old goals modified as you grow and realize that you set your original goal too low. Have the list in a handy spot where you see it daily.
Point 3: Review your goals at least once a month. Having a written list of your goals will make monthly reviews easy. Sit down somewhere quite and spend some honest time with yourself evaluating how your work towards each goal is progressing. This is a time you can add to your list if you need to. I just today sat down with the family to review our goal progress so far this year. Each of us added at least one new goal to our list. My new goals were to renew an old friendship, and to start a new friendship. This is also a time to modify a goal if you need to. This could include raising or lower your expectations for yourself. In my case, I originally set a goal to complete in a sprint triathlon this year. I've realized that I'll be able to do more than this, so I reset the goal to complete in 2 sprint triathlons and 1 olympic triathlon. You might also need to lower a goal because life circumstances have changed.
Point 4: Share your goals with others. There is no better accountability than telling family, friends, and coworkers your goals. When the going gets rough, and you feel like giving up, just knowing that someone is going to ask you how your goal is coming is motivating. And you may find help from some of these people. Just yesterday, out of the blue, a coworker gave me a triathlon training book he had lying around. Free book to help me with my goal!
Point 5: Be flexible. You will naturally set some goals too low. Sometimes, you just don't know what you can do until you try it. Then you find you are much better suited for it than you thought. If it looks like a goal you set will be too easy, don't hesitate to make a more difficult goal for yourself. On the other hand, don't beat yourself up if a goal you set was just to ambitious. It's okay to lower a goal. Lowering a goal is much better than just quitting on it all together.
Point 6: Falling behind in a goal is a time to re-focus, not give up. If you find there is a goal you are struggling with, don't allow yourself to quit on it. One bad meal on a diet doesn't have to lead to a bad day. Refocus, and make the best out of the rest of the day. Don't let your mind rationalize quitting, either short term or long term. Your mind might say that since you gave in to that chocolate cake for dessert at lunch, you might as well have what you want the rest of the day and get back on track the next day. That is just the beginning of a slippery slope. Refocus as soon as you realize you stumbled on your goal. Remind yourself why you set the goal in the first place. Remember how good it felt just to set the goal and know that you were taking your first step towards improving yourself. A mistake is not a failure unless you quit. It might be time to find some fresh material to read pertaining to your goal and re-motivate yourself.
You are on your way out of ordinary and toward extraordinary. Set yourself some challenging goals, write them down and put them where you will see them daily, and stay focused.
Let me leave you with this. It's not all about the goal. It's about the journey. Fall in love with the process of becoming better, not just the end product, and you will enjoy your life much more. You don't sing a song to get to the end….
Goal setting is so easy that even a 7 year old can learn it. As I said in an earlier post, on New Year's Eve I sat with my wife and daughters and we each set our goals for the year. After the girls returned to school, my first grader's teacher talked to her class about resolutions, and shared as an example that hers was to lose weight. Her teacher later shared with me that my daughter was quick to correct her and tell her that her goal was not specific enough. My daughter let her teacher know that goals have to be specific, so she shouldn't just say she wants to lose wieght, but also how much. Just like dear old dad taught her!
So that leads me to point 1: Be specific, and be as specific as you can. Think of a target you might shoot at. It is in the shape of a circle with rings painted on it, each smaller as you get to the center, ending in the middle with a bullseye. Setting a general goal is better than no goal at all, but what will help you be more successful is setting a goal with a bullseye. A goal to eat more fruit is a broad and blurry target. A goal to eat 2 pieces of fruit a day is a bullseye. A specific goal will be much easier to track. You will know daily weather you are achieving your goal, and if not, you will know exactly what you need to do to improve.
Point 2: Write your goals down. It may seem a given, but you should have a written list of your goals. This list will not be etched in stone. I hope that after several months, it will have coffee stains on it because you look over it at breakfast, it will have check marks by goals you have accomplished, it will have new goals written on it, and it will have old goals modified as you grow and realize that you set your original goal too low. Have the list in a handy spot where you see it daily.
Point 3: Review your goals at least once a month. Having a written list of your goals will make monthly reviews easy. Sit down somewhere quite and spend some honest time with yourself evaluating how your work towards each goal is progressing. This is a time you can add to your list if you need to. I just today sat down with the family to review our goal progress so far this year. Each of us added at least one new goal to our list. My new goals were to renew an old friendship, and to start a new friendship. This is also a time to modify a goal if you need to. This could include raising or lower your expectations for yourself. In my case, I originally set a goal to complete in a sprint triathlon this year. I've realized that I'll be able to do more than this, so I reset the goal to complete in 2 sprint triathlons and 1 olympic triathlon. You might also need to lower a goal because life circumstances have changed.
Point 4: Share your goals with others. There is no better accountability than telling family, friends, and coworkers your goals. When the going gets rough, and you feel like giving up, just knowing that someone is going to ask you how your goal is coming is motivating. And you may find help from some of these people. Just yesterday, out of the blue, a coworker gave me a triathlon training book he had lying around. Free book to help me with my goal!
Point 5: Be flexible. You will naturally set some goals too low. Sometimes, you just don't know what you can do until you try it. Then you find you are much better suited for it than you thought. If it looks like a goal you set will be too easy, don't hesitate to make a more difficult goal for yourself. On the other hand, don't beat yourself up if a goal you set was just to ambitious. It's okay to lower a goal. Lowering a goal is much better than just quitting on it all together.
Point 6: Falling behind in a goal is a time to re-focus, not give up. If you find there is a goal you are struggling with, don't allow yourself to quit on it. One bad meal on a diet doesn't have to lead to a bad day. Refocus, and make the best out of the rest of the day. Don't let your mind rationalize quitting, either short term or long term. Your mind might say that since you gave in to that chocolate cake for dessert at lunch, you might as well have what you want the rest of the day and get back on track the next day. That is just the beginning of a slippery slope. Refocus as soon as you realize you stumbled on your goal. Remind yourself why you set the goal in the first place. Remember how good it felt just to set the goal and know that you were taking your first step towards improving yourself. A mistake is not a failure unless you quit. It might be time to find some fresh material to read pertaining to your goal and re-motivate yourself.
You are on your way out of ordinary and toward extraordinary. Set yourself some challenging goals, write them down and put them where you will see them daily, and stay focused.
Let me leave you with this. It's not all about the goal. It's about the journey. Fall in love with the process of becoming better, not just the end product, and you will enjoy your life much more. You don't sing a song to get to the end….
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Picking the correct weight target
I'm big on goal setting. For me, setting goals is an easy, and somewhat scary task. It's scary for me because I know that if I set a goal and write it on my goals list, it's gonna happen. So I'm careful when setting my goals to set ones that I know I have the time to achieve.
New Years Eve 2010 I sat down with my family at the kitchen table and we all set goals for 2011. The goal I set for myself concerning my weight was "to consistently weigh 145 pounds.". It's just a bit of a challenge for me to keep that weight. Today I tipped the scale at 149. There are several factors that will cause your weight to fluctuate throughout a week, so you can give yourself a small window of + or - 2 to 3 pounds. You can see that I have a little work to do myself.
I want to give you a method of picking a weight for your target. There are several ways you could go about this. You could have a goal to be a certain jean or dress size, and not even be concerned about the weight. You might pick a weight from you glory days, like when you got married or when you were the wrestling champ in high school. But I recommend finding what your Body Mass Index (BMI) is and using that as your target. Your BMI is a calculation based on your height and weight and applies to both men and women.
Before we look at calculating your BMI, let's take a look at why you want yours to be lower in the first place. A higher BMI is a risk factor for heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, and certain types of cancers.
Have high blood pressure? It has been estimated that a pound of fat has approximately 1 mile of capillary blood vessels supplying blood to it. Pop quiz...if you have 30 pounds of extra fat on your body, how many miles of extra blood vessels does your heart have to pump blood through? Too many!
Speaking of a pound of fat, here is a picture of what it looks like.
If that's not enough for you, here is what 5 pounds looks like.
How many of you just threw up in your mouth? Luckily, we have skin to cover that up. It should be easy to see that having an extra 5 or more pounds of this stuff is just not going to be beneficial to you.
Now that you're motivated, let me show you how to find your healthy BMI.
In this case, I'm not going to worry about the actual calculation. It's just too easy to google a BMI calculator and plug in your height and weight. Instead, here is a handy chart. I like it because it let's me quickly see different scenarios, such at which weight I will move from being classified as obese to overweight, and overweight to healthy.
To use the chart find your height in inches on the left and your weight on the top. Where the two rows intersect is your BMI. Use the key at the bottom to find out where you are classified.
When I first found out about BMI, I was 213 pounds. With my 66 inch frame, that put me at a BMI of about 34, or in the obese category. I can tell you that was not easy news to swallow. So if you find yourself in the same boat, I'll tell you that I can relate. The good news is that you are in control of that number, and can lower it over time with your diet and an active lifestyle.
I started about 23 pounds over the "overweight" category. That's irony...I had to lose 23 pounds just to be overweight. So that became goal #1, and a milestone in my weight loss. When I got down to 180 pounds, it was actually fun telling people, "I'm not obese anymore, I'm only overweight."
Notice there is a range for your optimal weight. I've chosen 5 pounds below the threshold so that I have a little wiggle room for my weight to fluctuate as it will naturally. And did you see that the chart does not consider age? So no excuses just because you've seen a few more Christmases than the rest of us.
Your ultimate goal should be to get into the "optimal" category. Once you are there, you can re-evaluate what weight you want to target. Maybe you still have some love handles you need to get rid of. It's not just about vanity. Love handles is just a euphemism for adipose(fat tissue). Remember that for every pound of this extra fat, you heart is pumping through another mile of capillary tubing.
For some of you with higher BMIs it might be a long journey to get to your optimal weight. Just keep this in mind. You don't have to reach that weight to get health benefits. With every pound of fat that you lose, your body is getting healthier. Your chance of heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure will be decreasing.
Before you get all Nazi on me trying to lose every ounce of fat, know that our goal is not to get rid of all body fat. Fat is important to our bodies, and we will always have some. It provides cushioning for our organs, insulation to our bodies, and is a place for storing fuel for our metabolic engines.
Next we'll look at what "spot burning" is and why it doesn't work. Until then, why not take a few minutes to play with a BMI calculator and find what your optimal weight is. Set a goal weight, write it down, and place it where you can see it daily.
Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
New Years Eve 2010 I sat down with my family at the kitchen table and we all set goals for 2011. The goal I set for myself concerning my weight was "to consistently weigh 145 pounds.". It's just a bit of a challenge for me to keep that weight. Today I tipped the scale at 149. There are several factors that will cause your weight to fluctuate throughout a week, so you can give yourself a small window of + or - 2 to 3 pounds. You can see that I have a little work to do myself.
I want to give you a method of picking a weight for your target. There are several ways you could go about this. You could have a goal to be a certain jean or dress size, and not even be concerned about the weight. You might pick a weight from you glory days, like when you got married or when you were the wrestling champ in high school. But I recommend finding what your Body Mass Index (BMI) is and using that as your target. Your BMI is a calculation based on your height and weight and applies to both men and women.
Before we look at calculating your BMI, let's take a look at why you want yours to be lower in the first place. A higher BMI is a risk factor for heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, and certain types of cancers.
Have high blood pressure? It has been estimated that a pound of fat has approximately 1 mile of capillary blood vessels supplying blood to it. Pop quiz...if you have 30 pounds of extra fat on your body, how many miles of extra blood vessels does your heart have to pump blood through? Too many!
Speaking of a pound of fat, here is a picture of what it looks like.
If that's not enough for you, here is what 5 pounds looks like.
How many of you just threw up in your mouth? Luckily, we have skin to cover that up. It should be easy to see that having an extra 5 or more pounds of this stuff is just not going to be beneficial to you.
Now that you're motivated, let me show you how to find your healthy BMI.
In this case, I'm not going to worry about the actual calculation. It's just too easy to google a BMI calculator and plug in your height and weight. Instead, here is a handy chart. I like it because it let's me quickly see different scenarios, such at which weight I will move from being classified as obese to overweight, and overweight to healthy.
To use the chart find your height in inches on the left and your weight on the top. Where the two rows intersect is your BMI. Use the key at the bottom to find out where you are classified.
When I first found out about BMI, I was 213 pounds. With my 66 inch frame, that put me at a BMI of about 34, or in the obese category. I can tell you that was not easy news to swallow. So if you find yourself in the same boat, I'll tell you that I can relate. The good news is that you are in control of that number, and can lower it over time with your diet and an active lifestyle.
I started about 23 pounds over the "overweight" category. That's irony...I had to lose 23 pounds just to be overweight. So that became goal #1, and a milestone in my weight loss. When I got down to 180 pounds, it was actually fun telling people, "I'm not obese anymore, I'm only overweight."
Notice there is a range for your optimal weight. I've chosen 5 pounds below the threshold so that I have a little wiggle room for my weight to fluctuate as it will naturally. And did you see that the chart does not consider age? So no excuses just because you've seen a few more Christmases than the rest of us.
Your ultimate goal should be to get into the "optimal" category. Once you are there, you can re-evaluate what weight you want to target. Maybe you still have some love handles you need to get rid of. It's not just about vanity. Love handles is just a euphemism for adipose(fat tissue). Remember that for every pound of this extra fat, you heart is pumping through another mile of capillary tubing.
For some of you with higher BMIs it might be a long journey to get to your optimal weight. Just keep this in mind. You don't have to reach that weight to get health benefits. With every pound of fat that you lose, your body is getting healthier. Your chance of heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure will be decreasing.
Before you get all Nazi on me trying to lose every ounce of fat, know that our goal is not to get rid of all body fat. Fat is important to our bodies, and we will always have some. It provides cushioning for our organs, insulation to our bodies, and is a place for storing fuel for our metabolic engines.
Next we'll look at what "spot burning" is and why it doesn't work. Until then, why not take a few minutes to play with a BMI calculator and find what your optimal weight is. Set a goal weight, write it down, and place it where you can see it daily.
Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
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