Excellence

Ordinary or extraordinary? 20 or 30 years from now, which of these words will describe how you lived your life. Did you make your life's choices because they were easy, normal, or what everyone else did? Or did you challenge the norm? Did you conform, or did you strive for something better? Did you do what everyone else was doing because it was easy, or did you step out and do what you really wanted to do even though it was more difficult?

When people ask you, "what do you do?", do you answer with your profession? Or do you have something greater about your life than where you spend 40 hours a week that defines who you are?

Peer pressure doesn't end when we graduate high school, or even college. It is present our entire lives. If your neighbors, co-workers, friends, and family happen to be the most excellent spouses, parents, and employees, if they are healthy, happy, and financially secure, then you will be surrounded by positive peer pressure. But if your peers don't meet all these standards, it's probably safe to say that you have plenty of neutral or negative peer pressure in your life.

More than likely peer pressure is influencing how much and what you watch on tv and what you let your kids watch. It may affect where you go on vacations, what you eat, what type of car you drive, where you live, how you decorate your house, what you wear, what music you listen to. Just about all decisions we make can be affected by peer pressure, either for good, for bad, or indifferent.

Is there an area of your life you would like to achieve excellence in? It could be health, friendship, family roles, a sport, or career. If you are wanting to focus on excellence in your life, you need to realize that excellence is difficult. People who seek excellence are often ridiculed for being different by their peers.

For example, if you choose to parent with a more "traditional" approach and follow more strict guideline as to what you allow your children to watch on tv or at the movies, you are sure to hear from some other parents about being "over protective."

Humans are social animals. We don't like being outcasts. It's far easier to go along with the crowd than to stand out. I think that anyone who seeks excellence should go out of their way to be laid back. Practice humility. Certainly don't act as if you are better than others. Appear ordinary in every way you can. I believe by doing this that you can avoid turning other people off and maybe be motivation to a few others to pursue excellence themselves. Wanting to help others better themselves is another way we can reach excellence.

5 qualities will lead you to excellence.

1. High Motivation. This goes beyond giving lip service to goals. A truly motivated person is on a mission. They have a hard time keeping themselves in check. They spend time writing and evaluating their goals. They study by reading books, watching videos, and attending clinics and seminars. They get up early and stay up late. They welcome company in their journey, but will go it alone if they need to.

2. Discipline. The disciplined person will make daily sacrifices and make do with hardships in order to excel. If they are trying to achieve a healthy weight, they can go to a birthday party and say no to cake and ice cream. If they are aiming to be fit, they don't miss workouts. If they are striving for a promotion, they go in to work early and stay at work late. They don't get sloppy with anything that has to do with their goals. Most people don't have discipline like this, so you may find yourself making light of your own discipline to be accepted by your peers.

3. Confidence. Some people seem to live with an unwavering belief in themselves. I'm not one of those people. How many of us, when we got married or became parents, didn't wonder if we had what it took to be a good spouse or a good parent. Heck, I remember hoping that I had enough sense just to keep a baby alive, let alone to be a good parent. To have more confidence, all it takes is some success. Success breeds confidence. After that 1st kids made it to 3 years old and I hadn't let it die yet, I was much more confident bringing the 2nd one home. Never dwell on failures. Seek out and relive your successes.

4. Focus. Another way to think about this is to call it "purpose". Know where you want to go in life. Don't expect to drift along, going wherever the winds of life blow you, and one day end up achieving your goals. Each effort you make towards your goals leads towards excellence. But you have to take it one step at a time. Which leads us to...

5. Patience. Martial artists practice katas or forms. These are martial arts moves done in sequence like gymnastics floor exercises. They are simulations of martial arts moves in an imaginary fight with imaginary opponents. A Korean proverb says that once a student practices the kata 100 times, he knows the moves to the kata. Once he practices it 1000 times, he should be able to visualize the opponents lying around him on the floor who he has killed. Once he has practiced the kata 10,000 times, the moves of the kata will be so real and life-like that the audience watching him perform will be able to visualize the fight and the opponents being slain. Excellence takes time to achieve, and anyone wanting success will have to have patience and not give up early.

Excellence requires mental and emotional power. We all have the capacity to develop these mental abilities.